Unfortunately, there are decades-old stereotypes that still permeate the legal world, including the myth that half of all weddings are followed by a divorce. This may have been true in the past, but the divorce rate has been declining since the 1980s, and experts say that only about 40% of couples today head for divorce court, mostly because people are waiting longer to get married (as opposed to many couples who got married right out of high school), so their decisions about a spouse are often more sound.
But the divorce rate is not the only myth out there. Most of them are focused on men and the roles they play after a marriage is dissolved. The myths are at best, stereotypes; but at their worst, they paint portraits of men as caricatures who make money than human beings capable of playing dual roles in the household. Some myths to be mindful of include:
- Men don’t get custody of their children
It used to be that women, almost without question, were granted custody of the children in the event of a divorce. While most people still believe it, this custody myth is no longer true. Child custody is one of the biggest myths men face when going through a divorce. Many fathers are able to get full custody of their children, either if the mother agrees to it or if a court orders full custody for the dad. Recently, more courts are granting joint custody between mothers and fathers, and in about 17% of all custody cases – according to the Men’s Legal Center – fathers are granted custody of the children.
- Men aren’t the ones who file for divorce.
While the majority of divorce cases are filed by women, 30% of men file the paperwork to dissolve their marriages.
- Men can’t get alimony.
If you’ve ever seen an episode of any Real Housewives franchise, you know that men are often granted alimony after a divorce. According to TIME magazine, about 42% of mothers are the main breadwinners, and many men are stay-at-home dads. This means that men are more likely to be granted full custody in the event of a divorce and are entitled to both alimony and child support.
- Men lose their family home if they file for divorce.
In many cases, men are the ones who keep the family home, especially if they have full custody of the children. Generally, the spouse who has custody of children will keep the house. If there are no children, negotiations often come out in the man’s favor regarding the family home.
- Divorce leaves men destitute.
While many men do take a financial hit after a divorce, the right attorney can help ease the financial burden of a divorce based on circumstances surrounding the split.
- Men are more likely to cheat in a marriage.
As it turns out, women as slightly more likely to cheat and are better liars about it, according to men who have been victims of infidelity on the website Quora. (Take this with a grain of salt.) In reality, both sexes tend to cheat at about the same rate.
- Child support and visitation are connected.
The common myth is that if a man falls behind in child support payments, his former spouse can block access to the kids. Unless the ex-wife goes to court, she cannot prevent her children’s dad from seeing the kids, even if child support payments are late.
- Men are bad parents.
Men are nurturers too, but society has given them the role of breadwinner, while women are seen as caregivers. In reality, experts say, both men and women are wired to be good parents, and we see more and more of that with the changing of traditional gender roles.
If your wife has filed for divorce and you want custody of the kids or to retain your family home, the right legal team can make it happen. Contact The Fab Law Firm, LLC, at 1-888-262-1618 to find out how we can help.